(The funniest part of this post is that I had to stop halfway through writing it to go do some of these things...)
There are a few things Austin requested right off the bat, as soon as he really figured out how much I thrive on routine and accountability. Some of these go beyond the typical Domestic Discipline framework and incorporate more of the Dominant/submissive vibe. That's just how we do things around here...
When Austin calls to tell me he is on his way home from work I am to have the following completed by the time he gets home, approximately 8 - 10 minutes later :
- Have a pair of his shorts and a t-shirt laid out on his side of the bed, along with his flip-flops
- Have a glass of iced tea waiting for him on the kitchen counter
- Have his mail on his desk
- Any mess the puppy has made in the living room is to be cleaned up - pieces of cardboard I give him to chew on or toys spread around the room
- Be prepared to give him a kiss and pause my work to spend 15 minutes chatting with him, including updating him on my plans for the evening and next day.
Since I work from home the majority of the time it is very easy for me to start working some time mid-afternoon and forget to stop when he gets home. This used to lead to one of those downward spiral things where I was so focused on my work that he felt ignored so he chose not to pay attention to me which I, in turn, took to mean he didn't want to talk. Often it would end up with both of us feeling slighted and annoyed without either of us ever meaning to offend the other. Now when he calls I finish up what I'm doing, figure out what I need to complete before I go to bed, and glance at my schedule for the next day.
Other things I am required to do:
- Be in bed by 10:30 pm, ready for him to rub my shoulder to help it feel better, with lights out at 10:45
- Wear my perfume every day because he likes the way it smells
- Ask him or one of the kids to scrub the kitchen counter so I don't irritate my shoulder
- Speak respectfully and kindly to him, no matter what
That last one is the biggest and most pervasive rule. It causes me the most problems and is the only thing that has earned me a negative consequence thus far. It is definitely an area I need to improve and one that continues to bother both of us in many ways. It has always been very easy for me to slip into annoyance, frustration, anxiety, or criticism and Austin isn't putting up with it any more, much to his credit.